Hey, Baby: 'From the Hips'

Map It:  Van Ness 

IN THEIR NEW book, "From the Hips," Rebecca Odes and Ceridwen Morris merely want to offer a "a comprehensive, open-minded, uncensored, totally honest guide to pregnancy, birth and becoming a parent."

Just don't call these longtime New York City residents "alternamoms." (Though trainspotters might recognize Odes from her stint in the buzzed about 1990s indie-rock band Love Child.)

Unlike the dozens of personality-free mommy-to-be and mommy-that-is books clogging stores, the tone of "From the Hips" is that of getting advice from smart, funny and trusting girlfriends. Plus, the authors call breasts "bazongas," so you know they're comfy speaking about anything.

Odes and Morris had a panel of experts, medical professionals and numerous mothers — who provide the "anonymom" quote bubbles that enliven the colorful book — vet their words, so the information is sound and healthy. But what makes "From the Hips" so appealing is how it delivers heavyweight info without weighing a ton. In a clear and friendly manner, the twosome break down the myriad options and situations that forthcoming and new moms face, making subjects such as genetic testing and breastfeeding not seem so scary.

Express caught up with the duo via e-mail before their Saturday afternoon appearance at Politics & Prose.

» EXPRESS: If Neal Pollack is "Alternadad," would you sock me in the nose for calling you two alternamoms?
» HIPS: Don't let the stylish cover fool you; this is not a book about hipster parenting! Our personal tastes may lean indie but the book isn't for a particular kind of parent. It deals with age old dilemmas as well as modern ones that all parents face, regardless of iPod playlist.

» EXPRESS: Is it harder to raise kids in places like New York City and D.C. than it is in the distant suburbs or in a rural area? Any tips for city folks raising kids?
» HIPS: We've only had experiences in the city, so we can't personally comment on what it's like elsewhere. We've heard from parents in both settings and each comes with its baggage — we are thrilled not have to deal with schlepping around in traffic all day, but we are not so thrilled when we have to lug a stroller and child up an extremely tall flight of urine soaked subway stairs.

As for tips for the city, we have so many. Here are a couple: Take stroller shopping seriously; you'll use the thing a lot. Make sure you can tote it; it's tough enough to last and can function as transport, nap spot, meal seat and double as a shopping cart. If you're nervous about public breastfeeding but feel like you are trapped in your small apartment, just try it. You'll probably find that it wasn't that hard or big a deal or even noticed.

» EXPRESS: Has breastfeeding gotten harder as science and supplements have gotten better?
» HIPS: Formula hasn't changed biology — it may have changed our attitudes but not our abilities as a species. If breastfeeding had always been easy for every single woman there probably wouldn't have been so many desperate attempts to find an alternative food source for babies. It's likely that when formula was less safe or available, it was more important to know about breastfeeding: how to do it; how to deal with the problems that come up, etc. So it may have been "easier" in the sense that it was easier to get help — or at least a wet nurse. We were both amazed at how many women — women who took great care to work hard on breastfeeding — said things along the lines of "Holy crap, it hurt like hell."

» EXPRESS: Do you think genetic counseling causes more anxiety than it needs to?
» HIPS: We felt so strongly about being as straightforward as possible about the genetic information. It can be totally overwhelming and, unfortunately, it's something that happens really early on for expectant parents over 35. You're still celebrating the plus sign and all of a sudden you're getting a lecture about extremely rare fatal conditions and being asked about your long-lost relatives' mental problems or what have you. Genetic counseling is not a bad idea. The goal is to inform and to assist. We hope our book will help couples get a clear picture of the options so it's a tad less stressful.

» EXPRESS: The design of your book is unique, from the colorful pages to the numerous balloon quotes throughout. What made you decide on this design and did it introduce any challenges when writing the book?
» HIPS: One of our goals in this book was to make it fun to read. We felt that while pregnancy itself was enjoying a style upgrade, the pregnancy books were still living in the soft-focus, tent-dress past. The design was an outgrowth of Rebecca's first book, "Deal With It!" which also included many quotes. We worked with Georgia Rucker, who also did the books Rebecca did with gURL.com [which Odes co-founded]. We approach topics from many points of view — candid commentary from moms, expert opinion, medical info — and the design really reflects that.

» EXPRESS: Is that Marilyn Manson's baby on pg. 287?
» HIPS: Rebecca's drawings are so awesome — she always made sure to show how babies have weird faces at first — squished and old man-like or, in this case, slightly goth!

» EXPRESS: Did you ever worry that your book is too diplomatic, too unwilling to pick a "best way" to do something? Because sometimes new parents are in such an emotional state that they just want to be pointed a certain way, not given multiple routes.
» HIPS: The emotional state you describe is exactly why parents don't need a specific route, in our opinion. When we were exhausted and dealing with sleep issues, for example, we felt undermined by most of what we read. The fact is that modern parents will hear opposing agendas, whether from different books or other people. Parents get a huge amount of propaganda about how a certain way is the best or only way, and end up feeling duped when someone's foolproof expert plan fails to get their baby to sleep through the night or whatever else it's supposed to do.

We decided instead to be a resource for all those inevitable choices, providing very direct information about each option and encouraging readers to do what feels right for them. If you learn how to sift through the agendas early on, you are going to feel more confident in the long run. Having said all that, we do point readers a certain way when there's little debate over an issue. We have plenty of flat-out information: here's how to swaddle; these are the papers you need at the hospital; these are the medical recommendations regarding eating and drinking during pregnancy.

» EXPRESS: How did you get Gwyneth Paltrow to blurb the book?
» HIPS: We mauled her in a breastfeeding support group in Knightsbridge. No, actually we have a close mutual friend who gave her the book and she seemed to really like it!

» EXPRESS: Planning on having more kids?
» HIPS: Number two is currently gestating for Ceridwen! Rebecca's been up since 4 a.m. with her second, so at the moment she's thinking probably not.

» Politics & Prose, 5015 Connecticut Ave. NW; Sat., 1 p.m., free; 202-364-1919. (Van Ness)

Photo by Nicole Polec; images courtesy Crown Publishing Group/Random House Inc.