People: Paris Heads Back to Prison

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"MOM, MOM, MOM."Those were the frantic words that Paris Hilton cried when an L.A. judge ruled that the heiress was not to be kept under house arrest, but instead had to return to jail to finish the rest of her sentence.

The background: After crying (a lot) and refusing to eat in jail, Hilton was sprung by the sheriff's department and allowed to return to her mansion yesterday, where PR opportunists brought in her favorite cupcakes to console her.

Not so fast ... A fiery city attorney and ticked off judge wanted to put Hilton back behind bars and demanded an emergency court session this morning. The heiress wasn't planning to show up at court — she'd been told she could participate by phone. The judge wasn't pleased. The result? Sheriff's deputies came to her house, handcuffed her and drove her off to court — the paparazzi clowns in mad pursuit. [People; NYDN; TMZ]

» CLEARLY HE'S MISTAKEN. This has to be one of our favorite quotes of the year. Sylvester Stallone claims he is "Hugh Grant trapped inside the body of a thug." Um hello, Sly? Surely you're forgetting how thugish Hugh can be with a tub of beans. [Daily Mail; Free Ride/Express]

» ABC DON'T WANT NO SCRUBS. Or to put it more specifically, the network doesn't want Isaiah Washington in scrubs anymore — the actor got axed from "Grey's Anatomy." [People]

» A D.C. AIR GUITAR GOD IS BORN: Meet Lance 'The Shred' Kasten the best air guitarist in all of Washington. How'd the D.C. round of the U.S. Air Guitar Compeition end? With a jam fest to 'Free Bird' of course (See it here). [WaPo]

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