People: Harrison Ford Still Not Impressed with Punk Kid

BAD EXAMPLES
LUCASFILM ANXIOUS
A $1,000 bench warrant was issued for Shia LaBeouf on Tuesday after the star of "Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull" failed to appear in court on a charge of lighting up where he shouldn't. The 21-year-old was cited last month in Los Angeles for unlawful smoking. He was scheduled to appear Tuesday, but neither he nor his lawyer showed up.

TRANSLATION
'MY STABBING MAKES ME INTERESTING TO READERS'
Former tennis great Monica Seles is working on a memoir. She said Wednesday that she hopes "to share how I found balance, strength and happiness in my life after a rollercoaster ride of exhilarating accomplishment and sometimes overwhelming tragedy." Seles, 34, won nine Grand Slam tournaments. But she is also known for one of the sport's most terrifying incidents: In April 1993, she was stabbed in the back at a tournament by a man who climbed out of the stands.

PADDING
ITEM ON BERRY'S CHILD SO SHORT IT REQUIRES HUGE HEADLINE TO ADEQUATELY FILL THE SPACE
Halle Berry's newborn daughter is named Nahla Ariela Aubry, her publicist Meredith O'Sullivan told The Associated Press on Tuesday. Nahla was born Sunday to Berry, 41, and her beau, model Gabriel Aubry, 32. Nahla is Berry's first child.

SENESCENCE
ELDERLY MAN CROAKS MULTISYLLABIC NONSENSE
Dick Van Dyke may be 82, but he can still get 14 syllables into a single word. Van Dyke sang "Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious" on Monday night at the Geffen Playhouse in Los Angeles during a tribute to actress Annette Bening and studio chief Robert A. Iger.

» Pictured left: Just nod and smile when he speaks.

RELIEF
ANDERSON COOPER HAS MOLE REMOVED FROM HIS FACE
Anderson Cooper was back at work Wednesday after minor surgery two days earlier to remove a cancerous mole from underneath his left eye. There was no indication the skin cancer had spread, spokeswoman Shimrit Sheetrit said.

STATES
HE'S ONE DEVILISH SMIRK AWAY FROM GOVERNOR
For one night, Maysville, Ky., will be Hollywood along the Ohio River, thanks to George Clooney. The 46-year-old actor will visit the town Monday night for a special screening of his new movie, "Leatherheads." Clooney grew up in Augusta, about 16 miles west of Maysville. "Leatherheads," which also stars Renee Zellweger, is a romantic comedy set in the world of 1920s pro football.

With contributions from The Associated Press
Photos by Stephen Shugerman/Getty; Frazer Harrison/Getty Images